Mourning the Loss
by Devils'kin
Summary: Petunia and her thoughts on her witch of a sister


Just a little ficlet that came to me the other night. It just kinda came pouring out so if it seems a little jumbled that's why I did try to edit it.

Disclaimer: I own not the wondrous world of Harry Potter it belongs to the masterful J.K. Rowling and I bow to her imaginative prowess.

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A girl stood at the end of a bed and looked at her little sister sleeping peacefully with vivid red hair spread around a pale face speckled with a large smattering of freckles across the bridge of her dainty nose. The sleeping girl had a small smile on her face as if she hadn't a care in the world. _I guess she wouldn't_. The standing girl thought with a harsh look on her long face, her hair was pulled back in a severe braid that made her sharp cheekbones more pronounced. Her dark eyes watching the slow breathing of the sleeping form. The sleeping girl did in fact have something to be excited for. This was her last night at home before leaving for ten months for her first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. _She can stay there forever for all I care. _ The standing figure thought keeping her tears in check. _What about her is so special she's only eleven? I'm the older sister shouldn't I be the role model? Why can't I ever get __**something**__ better then the Perfect Lillian Evans? I do well in school, I keep curfew, and only have respectable friends with parents that are part of a country club, but once again I'm left in the shadow of my little sister. _

Petunia Evans let her hard gaze soften as Lily murmured in her sleep calling for her sister. She looked at the form of her baby sister, her best friend and at times her most hated enemy. _She was my best friend and now I've lost her and she won't be coming back this time. First to that Severus boy now to a completely different world I will never understand or be a part of. _Petunia lost her soft gaze letting it harden to ice at the prone figure in front of her. Until the love that she once held in her heart for her sister was but the tiniest spark in her heart. In her hands she held a piece of parchment and the other a bright picture. The parchment held the reason for her current place by her sister's bed in the dead of the night.

_Dear Miss Evans_

_It is with very real regret that I must tell you that we will not be able to offer you a place at Hogwarts this fall…_

The letter was from Albus Dumbledore Headmaster of Hogwarts the school Lily was to start the next day. She had received it while her parents had taken Lil—_no the Freak_ – to get her school supplies.

_It had probably been full of weirdos and unbearable types of people_ Petunia thought. Since Lily had gotten her letter Petunia had been pulling away from her and trying to come to terms with the fact her sister was a witch, but it was too much. Lily had always been different that was for sure. She stood out with her red hair and green eyes. Her personality was unbearably cheerful even when she was sad. The only crutch was her temper, it wasn't easy to flame but once it was she could go for hours. Lily had always out shone her big sister and this was finally the last straw. _I don't need her _Petunia sneered at Lily. T_he Freak can go and learn all this nonsense I refuse to be part of all this freakishness._ With that last thought Petunia left the bedroom closing the door firmly behind her. She looked down at her clenched hands. The parchment crumpled but the picture was still in tact. The picture was of two girls. One was taller with dark hair and eyes. Her long face gave her the appearance of a horse and her fame was skinny before her advances to womanhood. Her thin lips were stretched to a wide smile as she looked down to the other girl. The second girl was younger and smaller in frame ten the first. With bright red hair falling from it's tight braid. She had vibrant green eyes that shone from her rounded face as she looked at the camera and smiled to whoever was taking the picture. Two girls that looked so very different in appearances. One would never guess that they were sisters. Petunia felt her eyes start to sting for the hundredth time that day and bit her lip to hold off the tears. She tore the picture into as many pieces as she could. As if she could erase the past if she could remove the evidence of that one little picture. Throwing the pieces into the hallway she walked briskly to her own room on the way to her bed throwing the crumpled parchment into the bin. "That Freak is no sister of mine." She told herself aloud as she laid on her bed and the tears could no longer be repressed. Petunia Evans cried herself to sleep that night. She cried for many reason her pride, her pettiness, her jealousy but the biggest thing she cried for was the loss of her best friend and only sister Lily Evans.

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So hope you liked it and that you'll review I might make write one for each year leading up to the Potters' death. So please help me out and review. Thanks lovelies.


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